With Open Hands: Since the beginning of the summer I’ve frequently ...

With Open Hands: Since the beginning of the summer I’ve frequently ...: "Since the beginning of the summer I’ve frequently had these “I can’t believe I’m really in Africa” pinch me moments. While I’ve been here in..."

Jamaican me think. A lot.

So I just got off the phone with Penie in Jamaica. 15 years ago, she and her husband Jim left their lives as foster parents in the states to start a home in Whitehouse, Jamaica called "My Father's House."

Dozens of kids later they find themselves wondering how to keep the lights on. How to keep the water running. How to minister to families that call them and say "Papa Jim, we need food. We need clothes. Can you help?"

I've been to Jamaica. I've seen the poverty right outside of the Sandals resorts. I've seen the loneliness and the broken families and the need. And I had the chance (twice now, and soon to be three times) to walk alongside Mama Penie and Papa Jim and see their impact on the community there. They are not the big bad Americans that come in for an experience and give out material things and leave. They are the Jamaican citizens that work alongside families to build houses, to give out food, to hug kids, to carry water. And I got to do that too. For a week.

Soon, when God says so, we are going to start a campaign to help keep My Father's House open and keep those communities cared for. Soon, I hope you will take five minutes out of your day and contribute financially. It's awful that, when I say that, most of us think...I can't afford it. But think again. $5 in Jamaica goes so much farther than it does where we live. We can afford to give. Let's skip Starbucks. Skip the movies. Skip the fast food run. And give.

I'll be hollering at you soon. And I hope you holler back.


-Liz

Becca's back! Now where are YOU going?

Today we greeted Becca and welcomed her back to America. She flew into RDU from Uganda. Not a quick journey. Planes and busses and all things in between. Becca has been gone for 2 1/2 months with Embrace Uganda. She lived with the fatherless and was loved by them all. I am SURE her blog will blow up with what she learned, how she was changed, what she is going to do next.

So check that out. And think about, today, what are your next steps? How will you go, change, or move? We can all take the first steps today. For some of us, it might mean working out. Maybe it means finally forgiving the person that has hurt you so many years ago. Does it mean you sponsor a child with World Vision? $35 a month will save a child's life. I spent $35 on dinner last night. What in the world?

I'm just saying...we all need to make a change that is LONG overdue. So what is it for you? What is it for me? Let's all make a pact to focus on the daily. Don't think about next year, or even tomorrow. Let's take a first step today. And that step will lead us somewhere crazy. Maybe even Uganda.

-Liz

"Mo Money Mo Problems"

I have always had a struggle with money. What to spend it on, how to save it, and how to get more of it. If I’m being honest with myself, it has taken control of my life at times.

My friend once said that if you want to know what you care about the most, look at where you spend your money. As Americans, we have ALL given in to spending our time and money on luxuries, big or small. The majority of us have jobs that we don’t even enjoy, and our FB statuses dread the morn of Mondays. I don’t know about you, but the idea of spending 5 out of 7 days dragging my feet bums me out hardcore. It doesn’t have to be that way. The truth is, we have allowed money to run our lives and on top of that, ruin our lives.

We live in a messed up world where your value comes from your job and your salary. “The Myth of Measure: a person’s opinion of you + your performance = your self-worth.” While the wealthy businessman is respected and admired because of his company that only feeds money back into itself, another man is trying to change the world, making barely any money at all, and is looked down upon. Does anyone else see how screwed up that is?! Your identity will never be found by the logo on your shirt or by the size of your house.

Want the truth? It’s not my money, and it’s not your money. It’s all God’s money.

I know that might seem ridiculous, but is it really that outrageous? When you recognize your money as belonging to God, it changes EVERYTHING. Not only does it change the way you spend your money, but it changes the way you WANT to spend it. I have never felt freer in my life than to be supporting the things I believe in with the little money I make. Trust me, I am a person that checks my bank account like its nobody’s business. I look at the puny little number and start to freak out. But when I worry about my finances, I am not trusting God, and that is a HUGE problem. He says that he will provide everything I need. The reality is, we lose sight of what we need and focus on what we WANT. We have let go of simplicity and have overcomplicated our lives with stuff. And that stuff we invest all our money in won’t last. When we put all our faith in our belongings, we are only setting ourselves up for disappointment. Chances are that that jacket will go missing, that phone will get stolen, and that car won’t last forever.

I had to recognize certain luxuries in my life that I needed to cut down and even cut out. It’s comforting to invest your money into a life of security, but those comforts will never satisfy. Let’s be real; we could go crazy everyday until we achieve the American Dream or obtain a certain status, but then what? Once we get it, are we really going to be content with what we have and how we portray ourselves? I think you know the answer.

It may seem radical, but while we are repeatedly throwing away our money on thrills, we are in reality throwing away our lives. I know it’s hard to see outside of the American bubble, but millions of people around the world can’t comprehend why we have “houses” for our cars, “rooms” just for our clothes, and these things called refrigerators that can store all the food we want for weeks on end. By no means is this a guilt-trip, but I think it’s safe to say that when you put things into perspective, we are crazy blessed to have the everyday things we have.

I’ll be honest: I am barely getting by this summer. My paychecks have literally been cut in half from a year ago. But the thing is, I am absolutely crazy about my job. Up until now, I have never felt such purpose in the work place. My bank account may not be getting bigger, but I thank God everyday that my heart is. God gave you specific talents and gifts to change lives, so don’t waste them! When you make your work your passionate about your life work, you’ve made it big.

So what’s my point? I have met people who have worked their whole lives for a plaque on the wall. I have met people who have slaved away at jobs they hate to buy a loved one a nice gift to please them for the time being. The fact is that none of those things will ever be enough. Whatever you do or wherever you go, let love be your lead. Here is the start to the rest of your life to bless people like crazy, whether in the workplace or out. Love is the only thing that makes this life worthwhile, and no money in the world could ever put a price on that.

I guess Notorious B.I.G. knew what he was talking about.

-Dee

Chapter 3: You're lost...and I'm saved!

I recently attended this huge Christian concert at our local arena. There were a few worship bands and a speaker that delivered the gospel message at the end of the concert. For months, this event was billed as something that local churches could bring their unbelieving friends to so they could hear the Gospel and come to know Jesus. There were thousands of people there, it was overwhelming. The place that I go to see NC State Basketball games was now packed with people singing “Holy, Holy, Holy.” It was overwhelming.

I have known Jesus over ten years now, and I know that part of me is jaded when it comes to these kinds of events. What would the speaker say to really bring people to know that Jesus died for them? How would he convey the great hope in the resurrection? In thirty minutes, how can he point people to forgiveness and salvation?

I knew we were in trouble when the opening prayer from a charismatic local preacher included something like this “God, save us from our sin. Save the homosexuals, deliver the lesbians from their sin…” and people around me hummed in agreement. In my mind I was trying to get the facts straight. This free concert they are putting on, it’s designed to bring our friends to Christ. So in theory, over half of the people in this arena, hearing this prayer, should not know who Jesus is or what Christians are about. They should be here with a friend of theirs that loves them and wants them to hear about Christ. Instead, they are hearing a prayer about saving not just sinners in general, but specifically, homosexuals. As a body, we should pray that we do not fall into temptation. It seems to me that sometimes our prayer life is to bind sinners in our lives, instead of binding the evil one himself.

The Sunday after the concert, I was talking with a woman at our church that went with me to chaperone our youth group. I asked her what she thought about it. She said one thing that really bothered her is the constant reference to “the lost”. The speaker mentioned “our lost friends” a lot. Our lost friends that were there with us. My friend said “I remember, before I came to Christ, I would hear churches use that term and it really offended me. Why am I lost, and they get to be saved? I felt like they looked down upon me.”

Have you ever been lost? I used to fly all over the country for my graphic design job, and I would have to navigate airports and shuttles and rental cars and highways. Every time I flew into Texas it frustrated me. Texas is filled with these things called frontage roads. Frontage roads run parallel to highways. Frontage roads only go one way on each side. Frontage roads expedite the road rage process. On one occasion, I had to stop at a gas station to get directions because mapquest failed to recognize these frontage roads. Flustered and late for an appointment, I ran in to get clarification. What if, in my desperation, the lady behind the counter answered my request for directions by saying “You’re lost!” I think things would get pretty serious pretty fast. I didn’t need her to tell me I was lost. That was pretty clear. I needed her to give me directions. Simple directions. I had a question, she had an answer. That’s how it works. Right?

My mom gives hilarious directions. “Take a right out of the driveway, you’ll see a stop sign at the corner, turn left there, because if you turn right you’ll end up going the wrong way, so turn left. Then you’ll see three cows on the right side of the road and you’ll want to pass them. Oh, then on your left is route 82 but you don’t want to turn on that road because that will take you into Kennett and you don’t want to go into town. So stay straight, and you’ll pass this cute little corner store next to Landhope, they sell scarves and jewelry and you can get cute beads there…”

This goes on and on. And you forget where you were going in the first place. Our lost friends don’t need us to tell them they are lost. And they don’t need us to give them complicated directions. Think about when you first heard about Jesus. Think about where you were, what was going on in your life at the time, what you knew about God. I absolutely knew that I was lost. I never needed someone to say that to me. That would be like turning the knife that was already stuck into me. I knew I needed something. I needed love. That’s it. The love of Jesus is the only thing that can save us.

When we tell our friends that they are lost, we are causing division. When they hear us refer to them as lost, and us as saved, we are damaging a very fragile relationship. The Christian world is seen as a bully, especially in America. Watch any documentary where a Christian politician is interviewed and you’ll see that to be true. The only time a Christian gets media attention is when they fall. The world loves to see Christians fall down. I think that is partly because we claim to have all the answers. We claim to be saved, and we condemn the unbelieving world to be lost.

 My life with Christ has been an amazing process. One thing I know for sure is that there are no checkpoints. That is a hard realization for me, because I am such a task-oriented person. I love getting things done. I feel a sense of accomplishment when I complete something, but then I am immediately onto something else.

I bought my first house a few years ago and my biggest project was the backyard. The yard was a disaster when I first moved in. There was this gnarly dog pen made out of chain link fence, there was a disheveled shed made of plywood, and the backyard was a forest of tall, gangly pine trees and overgrown brush. Over the next year, every weekend was spent in that backyard. I had a revolving door of friends come over with various skills and tools. We rebuilt the shed, we cut down dead trees, we dug up brush and raked all the old leaves into yard bags that lined my street every single Sunday. I planted grass seed and watered that lawn religiously. When I started to see grass come up it was such an amazing day.

Last summer we had the youth group end of year party in my backyard. There was about forty people back there eating hot dogs, sitting on my new deck with bench seating that some friends helped me build, throwing a football in the new emerald green grass, and swinging in the hammock that I tied between the two big pine trees I kept in tact. When the party was over and everyone left, that night I sat on that new deck and just looked over at what we had accomplished in that backyard and I was just so pleased. Now, one year later, I hardly ever take the time to go out back and think about what I accomplished.

I don’t think it’s terribly healthy to always look back. But I do think it is valuable to take stock of your spiritual accomplishments. The other day I went for a walk and I just stopped myself and sat with God. I never do that. If I’m not careful, my prayer life becomes a checklist. I sat on a bench and just let myself be with God and it was wonderful. God reminded me of where I have come from, what He has showed me, what He has saved me from. I was flooded with my relationship with Jesus. I was encouraged by where I had been with Him and how we have grown together. In my bible, on the very first page, I wrote something down that I guess I heard from a speaker in high school:

Never forget what you’ve been saved from.

If I have the mindset that I am saved and my friend is lost, that will affect the way I look at her. That will make me feel like I have all the answers and she doesn’t. I win, and she loses. It rarely makes me feel like I have to pray for her. It rarely shows me that Jesus died for her. It separates us as people. The reality is that there are lost people all around us, that we are called to love. But a greater reality that we ignore when we separate ourselves from them, is that we ourselves can be lost if we are not careful. We are saved when we are in a relationship with Jesus, when we are walking with Him and living in His will. Paul says it best in 1^st Corinthians 15:18 – “Then those also who have fallen asleep in Christ are lost.”

Have we fallen asleep in Christ? Have we taken our salvation for granted? Look at what Paul says in his letter to the Ephesians in chapter 5, verse 13-15 – “But everything exposed by the light becomes visible, for it is light that makes everything visible. This is why it is said: “Wake up, O sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you. Be very careful, then, how you live – not as unwise, but as wise.”

Never forget what you’ve been saved from. Remembering what Jesus has done for us is the key to understanding our friends that need Him. They know they are lost. Pointing them simply to Christ and praying for them is the best thing we can do. Your life is your witness. That simple sentence is probably one of the most complex directives of the Christian life. It requires a daily walk with God, doesn’t it?

“Wake up, O sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you.”

Hoarders

So there's this show on A&E called Hoarders. And it's about...well...hoarders. People that value their stuff over their family. So they build nests and walls and towers of clothes and gifts and boxes to keep people away. Of course I watch this and I say "These people need help."

What are the things that I count on, that I use, that I surround myself with, to separate me from the people that love me and that I want to love? Hoarders use material things. Maybe I hoard emotions. Maybe I hoard distance. Maybe I hoard time. Or...shoot...maybe all three.

There is a fear in all of us that if we give up the fight, if we remove the walls, if we allow ourselves to be open, we will not be received. Will people really love me if they really knew me? If they REALLY knew me?

I guess we have two options in life:

1. Surround ourselves with things that replace people and never be open. This option leads to a life of predictable loneliness and distance. You won't experience as much pain. But you most certainly won't experience joy and community.
2. Surround ourselves with people and be open. This option leads to a life of unpredictable adventure and community. Pain, joy, roller coaster, life. Life together.

I am guessing that all of us have chosen both of those options in different seasons of life. When we get to the point where we can be open without fearing the pain of rejection...that's the sweet spot.

Time to go throw away some knick knacks. And call a friend.

-Liz

Chapter 2: The Gallon Challenge

A few years ago, while I was a Young Life leader at a local high school, I caught wind of something spectacular. Apparently, it is physically impossible to drink a gallon of whole milk in one hour. “Impossible? I bet we could do it!” so thought a group of high school boys I knew. So, against our better judgment, a group of guy leaders decided to participate in the gallon challenge with the boys and document their scientific findings with video. Hey, it was all for the advancement of science, so what could go wrong?

(OK – let me give a little disclaimer here. I realize that this is a horrible idea. I do not support anyone actually doing this. I am a little embarrassed that I am even bringing this up, but it’s a classic hilarious moment from my life and time in ministry and, well, I am proud that I almost completed the challenge.)

We all filled up in the basement that Wednesday night and started Young Life. We sang a few songs, and then it was time to watch the tape of their highly scientific experiment. Ten guys, each armed with their own gallon of whole milk (we had learned that skim milk won’t do the trick) had one hour to drink their milk. The challenge is that you have to drink all of it. If they quit, they failed. But as we were about to see, there was another, more violent way, to fail this challenge.

Each boy started excited, they all drank half of their gallons relatively easily. Spirits were high, but the more milk they drank, the more their movements got slower and their eyelids droopy. Some of them started to sweat. Some of them took off layers of clothing in the hopes that they could “breathe through it” easier. It moved from a party atmosphere to business time pretty quickly.

And then there they were, all lined up on the balcony of one of the leaders’ apartments. Three quarters of a gallon down, one boy started to push air out of his mouth and then looked, well, frightened. He lurched his head over the side of the balcony and threw up. Now, throwing up is something we don’t like to talk about. It’s the ultimate loss of control. It’s our bodies rejecting something so quickly, and you always feel helpless. I remember if I was sick as a child, it was never more serious as when I was throwing up. That’s when doctors get called. That’s when school is out of the question. That’s when things got really serious, really fast. No matter how many times we throw up, we’re always surprised! It’s so unnatural.

But in my lifetime, I had never seen such unnatural throwing up. This boy who had just consumed the better part of a gallon of milk, was throwing that milk up. And I knew it was milk, because it was pure white in color and projecting about ten feet away from his mouth. To this day, it is one of the craziest things I had ever seen. Of course, upon seeing one boy throwing up, the other boys all threw up after him. No one finished the challenge. But watching that video, we were losing our minds. Even though I saw ten big guys fail the challenge, I thought, I bet I could do it and not throw up. I looked at some of the girls that were at Young Life that night, and they just nodded their heads back at me saying, heck yes, we want to try it, too!

Yes, you are reading this right. A group of high school girls, already seeing their more lactose tolerant friends failing at this task and throwing up, decided that they wanted to try it. Not only did I not discourage this idea, I invited them over to my house that weekend so we could all try it together. I was impressed that these girls were being so tough! How could I say no? I celebrated their boldness.

So there we were, on my back porch in North Raleigh, on a Saturday afternoon, drinking gallons of whole milk. You know where this was going, of course. So did I really, but we were all up for the challenge, and secretly, wondered what it was like to projectile vomit milk. It was a lot of milk.

You would have been proud of me. I made it farther than the other girls. Sure, we had some quitters that took a few gulps and bowed out. We had some bring Soft Batch cookies and drink milk through pink bendy straws. Clearly, they weren’t taking this seriously. They were no match for me. I wasn’t even the first one to throw up. Another leader, Taylor, was wearing black sling back heels. How can I remember her shoes after all these years? When someone throws up that much milk, all over their shoes, it’s pretty much burned in your brain.

I made it about three quarters of the way through my gallon of cold whole milk. There was a point there that I thought I would make it. That thought was quickly replaced with another, more painful thought. At that moment, I just wanted it to be over. I couldn’t take another sip. So I took a deep breath and let it all out. I will say this: I haven’t since, nor will I ever, throw up that much again. I believe it to be physically impossible. I was throwing up so long, that I could not catch my breath. I know you are reading this in disgust right now, but when we all were throwing up that milk, it was just that: pure, cold, white milk, flowing out of our mouths like rushing waterfalls. I have never been to Niagara Falls, but when I get there someday, I am confident that upon seeing it, the first thing I will think of is that Saturday on my back porch with those high school girls and our gallons of milk.

I’ve told that story many times. I’ve told it in many different allusions to the Gospel. But the core of that experience, for me, is this: we never listen to God’s warnings or advice until we ourselves can investigate that very thing that God tries to keep us from. God in His infinite wisdom knows better than me! That is a fact. And although I know that to be true in my heart, emotionally I still want to take things to the limit and find out for myself. I saw, with my own eyes, what drinking a gallon of milk does to you. A whole room of us saw that. And a whole room of us wanted to try and be the first people in history to defy those odds and not make ourselves sick. What a joke.

That level of disobedience, again, goes back to the beginning of time. Adam and Eve, in the Garden, were created by God to be with God, and they “were both naked, and they felt no shame.” (Genesis 2:25) They had an open connection with God. They were sinless! They felt no shame. Can you imagine living just a day in this world without feeling shame? Can you imagine a place where we aren’t ashamed of our bodies, of our failures, of our past, of our secrets, of our wild emotional swings? Adam and Eve had it all.

One thing I seem to forget…a lot. Not only am I fighting against my own sin, I am fighting against an enemy. I am fighting against the one that is “more crafty than any of the wild animals the Lord God has made.” (Genesis 3:1) Take a break and read Genesis 3. Read it a few times and then come back to this spot.

Man oh man! The story of the fall of man explains a lot. Here is the Cliffs Notes version of the story: Satan came as a serpent and tempted the woman to eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. Then the serpent convinces her that God would be ok with this idea, and that her eyes would be opened, and that’s a good thing, and that fruit is tasty, and she should go for it! So she got Adam in on it, and they ate that fruit, and their eyes were opened to their nakedness. Then God comes back and they—hide. They hide from God. They are ashamed. Now remember, Eve was tempted by Satan to eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. Thinking himself equal to God was the same thing that got Lucifer himself booted from “the mount of God” (read Ezekial 28:14-19).

When it comes to pride, we fight against the physical world and the spiritual world. The more we trust in God, the closer we get to knowing Him, the more we battle on both plains. The concept of pride, though, is a positive one. Take pride in your work, or, pride yourself on being on time. Be strong, be proud! Loud and proud!

But pride here, is not needing anything. Not needing anyone else, thinking yourself better than everyone else, being the expert, being the best, lacking nothing. I don’t know about you, but my moments of true pride, are pride in the Lord and what He has done. When I am proud of myself, I have to immediately thank God. Pride in ourselves is what moves us to make mistakes. Pride comes before a fall. Pride came before the fall of man. Pride came before the fall of man! Yet I still have to find out, on my own, if that sin will really hurt me like God says it will. So I go outside of God’s will for my life, and I fall into sin.

We have to be so careful not to live life like this. I know so many friends that came to the Lord in high school, but didn’t want to give their everyday lives up to Him. Before they knew it, they had once again chosen to turn their backs on God and live outside of His will. It is in the every day that pride creeps in. There is no scientific equation for your relationship with Jesus. It is exactly that—a relationship. In the Gospels, Jesus answered everyone that came up to him in ways they could understand. He spoke in their terms and on their level. For fisherman, he talked of fishing, for the rich young ruler, he talked of money, for the woman at the well, he talked of living water. What is it for you? In what ways is God on your level, trying to get your attention?

The ins and outs of your everyday life is what God cares about. He wants to be with you. He is crazy about you. We get scared of that. The idea of a lasting relationship is frightening. Our modern world is one of instant gratification. The days of waiting for anything are disappearing. Things are shipped overnight, paid for online, transferred immediately, authorized instantly, cooked in 30 seconds. At work, I complain that it takes thirty seconds for an email to get sent to someone, instead of the instantaneous delivery I want. When was the last time you took a walk, not to get your heart rate up and break a sweat, but just to listen to God? When was the last time you sat down, without your cell phone or your watch or your iPod, and looked at God’s creation as His captive audience?

If we want the full life that God promises, we have to go for it. “I have come so that they may have life, and have it to the full.” (John 10:10) We are in such a commitment-phobic society that we start to believe the lie that we don’t need to pursue God every single day. In any relationship, if you ignore the person you’re involved with, the relationship suffers and dies. God never turns His back on us, but we can turn our backs on Him. We have to be aware of that tendency and fight it. That is what the enemy wants for you: isolation.

Look at what Jesus says in Revelations 3:

“15 I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other! 16 So, because you are lukewarm--neither hot nor cold--I am about to spit you out of my mouth. 17 You say, 'I am rich; I have acquired wealth and do not need a thing.' But you do not realize that you are wretched, pitiful, poor, blind and naked. 18 I counsel you to buy from me gold refined in the fire, so you can become rich; and white clothes to wear, so you can cover your shameful nakedness; and salve to put on your eyes, so you can see.
19 Those whom I love I rebuke and discipline. So be earnest, and repent. 20 Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me.”


Have you ever been in a friendship or a relationship where the object of your affection is so loving and encouraging towards you that you can’t believe what you did to deserve such love? Maybe that person sends you loving emails or letters, or speaks to you in words you’ve been longing to hear. Unfortunately, those words will later break your heart. Something changes and you no longer feel that same love and affection from that person. You drift apart, you break up, you are left to heal on your own. Those words haunt you and are meaningless now, and you wonder if you will ever love or be loved like that again. Now imagine doing that over and over and over again. I wonder sometimes if I am doing that to my Father.


ave HYou didn’t think I would introduce you to the gallon challenge and not relate it to Revelations 3:16, do you? Our apathy is deadly. Our lukewarm disposition towards God can ruin us. Don’t let it. Be earnest, and repent.