Getting lost on purpose.

Second Empire. Best. Restaurant. Ever.

May has been a busy month. My parents visited for a weekend, my friend Tyler visited for a weekend, I turned a year older, and my motorcycle has become the most unexpected game changer (but if you ask my dad his opinion, owning a motorcycle is "one of the five worst decisions you could make in your life." Not sure of the other four, but I'll keep you posted.)

I turned 39 this year. To be 39 and single is so weird. There aren't a lot of people out there like me. I don't feel like I have a demographic. My Facebook feed is now filled with my friends' posts about kids and marriage and at-home businesses and parenting advice. Meanwhile, I post pictures of secret bookshelf doors and pinball arcades.

Bucket list for Barb.

I wish I had been okay in my own skin when I was 19. Or 29. Or 35. It took me a while to be ok with being different. I lived too many years trying to prove my worth. Trying to fit into a mold that never made sense to me.

I fully realize it's weird to own a motorcycle at this stage in my life. But for the first time ever, I have the confidence to just...not care if I'm weird. Growing older is scary, but there is a freedom in it that I didn't expect.

I saw the importance this weekend of getting lost on purpose. So I did. I got lost in Zebulon, Smithfield, Middlesex, Henderson, and a few other points in between. I got so lost in thought it was this deep realization that it is 100% ok to be who I am and to be different than the friends on my Facebook feed.

Whenever I see a motorcycle I yell out "Freedom!" But that took on a whole new meaning to me this week. It has become an outlet of freedom for me. An excuse to get lost. A reason to forget my phone and my schedule and my insecurities.

Imagine if we lived our lives out by God's unique design for us than by the world's impossible design for us. If that's not freedom, I don't know what is!

Getting lost in Smithfield...

...at "Popeye's Gas and Grill." And yes, that is a jean jacket vest.

And of course...the secret door for your viewing pleasure...