Sam's Town

Submitted by my friend Sam...and then thank Sam for his honesty that should remind you that you're not alone.

19 September 2011

What is it about tragedy that makes us honest with God? I wish I knew. But every time I experience some kind of set back, I seem to see God more clearly than ever before. And while this is all fine and good, a part of me hates myself for it. I mean…why now? Why not back then, when I was swimming in blessings, in His grace? He gives me all I need and more, and even though I call myself a warrior for him, I always end up defecting to the other side. I forsake Him and try to hold my own. I soak up the world for a while and delude myself into think that this is it. But then the rains come.

I had a bad day today. The worst in a while, actually. I prayed and was more honest with God than I had been in months. And even though I loved the feeling of His arms supporting me, I couldn’t help but grimace at my own lack of faith. That’s not the kind of love He deserves. He deserves SO MUCH MORE.

I want to love God the way we all should – proportionate to His love for us. But I know that’s impossible! It’s silly to even say it. To love God as much as He loves you is like trying to climb to the moon. Or like an infant trying to raise its parent. Or like…breathing underwater, forever. It simply can’t be done.

If it takes tragedy to bring me as close to God as I was today, bring on the rain. But I’d rather just learn to love Him right. So that’s gonna be my next few months, learning to love better. I’m not gonna try it by myself either. I’m going to seek others, surround myself with more of His children and love them better too. I guarantee I will screw up again and again but as long as He keeps being my Father, I’m gonna try my damnedest to be His son, in good times and bad.

-Sam

Fashion saves lives.

Our Etsy shop is reopened! You'll see a lot more styles being added over the next few days (thanks Becca!) Click here to start saving lives.

For every pair of earrings you buy, we send half of the money to World Vision to support their work in Ethiopia. Our goal is to watch the money you donate transform the lives in a specific area of the world. We are working with World Vision over the next few weeks to get status reports on current projects and ways we can support them. Once we have that specific info, you will see it here! To see what World Vision is doing in Ethiopia, click here.

GCM originally developed a relationship with the country of Ethiopia through the Experience: AIDS project that came to the Cary YMCA. To see that exhibit, click here.

So go ahead and shop! Be fashionable and know that you are making a big difference and starting a relationship with Ethiopia!
-Liz

Double Rainbow

So I was on a group kayaking jaunt for our work retreat yesterday. It was super quiet and calm on the sound, and we were paddling through grassy, marsh areas. Beautiful weather. Blue skies.

My co-worker was on a boat to my left and said "When I look at this, I can't believe that people don't think there is someone behind the design of the world, that we are just an accident and the world just happened to come together like this."

My audible response was "I think it's easier for people to just believe it's 'Mother Nature.'"

So then, my internal monologue kicked in. If we explain the beauty of the world by saying it's Mother Nature or pure environmental beauty, then we don't have to really respond. We can just admire the beauty from afar, when we want, and then we can walk away, when we want. We can forget. We can remain unchanged. We can do whatever we want.

But if we explain the beauty of the world by saying that there is a Creator that made this for ME to enjoy, well then, I have to respond. Think of it as the most elaborate, expensive, impossible gift that anyone has ever given you. Impossible to repay, impossible to forget, impossible to ignore. A gift that changes everything. A gift that lasts your whole life and then some. A gift that you didn't deserve, but it's yours to take.

But you have to take it.

See, the thing with God is, we can't remain unchanged. Otherwise we never accepted the gift at all. Do you see God in your life? Do you see him in people? Do you notice him trying to get your attention in nature? In a sunset or a rainstorm? If you look for him, you'll see him. And if you look for him tomorrow, you'll find him a thousand different ways.

The double rainbow guy was right. Oh my God.

Meeting people is easy! Right?!

Lately I have been meeting a lot of new people. A lot. In my job, I meet a lot of families. And I am at a new church, so there's a lot of new people to get to know there, too. If you ask me what one of strengths is, I would tell you that I love to meet new people and get to know them, and that I can talk to anyone and make them comfortable.

Here's why life has made that hard for me lately: there are TOO MANY ways to greet people. I've compiled a list of possible greeting options:

• The standard hand shake
• The urban hand shake (I don't know another way to describe this one, it's the one where you grab the hand and curve up the thumb. It's really cool.)
• The urban hand shake and one arm hug
• The urban hand shake and thumb snap release
• The pound
• The pound and blow up release
• The head nod
• The wave
• The side hug
• The full frontal hug
• The double cheek kiss (I just see this on the Real Housewives of New York, so I will include it)
• The slap five
• The high five
• The high five miss fake out low five
• The high five and hold on so you are now shaking hands with your arms raised in the air

I know there are more. But you get the picture. So you get past that initial awkwardness, and then, if you're like me, you immediately want to get past small talk. And as much as I would like that, I have to admit, you can't get past small talk. It would be great to go up to someone and say "Hey, let's skip the small talk. What's your deepest, darkest, secret?" My friend actually tried that tonight with a new person we met, and we said we were kidding. (But we weren't really kidding...it would be great if that worked.)

So there is no such thing as "speed friending." Meeting people isn't easy. Because what I am really afraid of, if I'm being honest, is to let people in right away before they have earned the right to be let in. But isn't that selfish? Most of us NEVER let people know us, regardless of how long we've known them! Some marriages are like this! Imagine knowing someone your whole life and not letting them know you back!

Here's an awkward high five in celebration of awkwardness. Keep being awkward, people. Because we are ALL awkward. And if we get past the awkwardness, we'll realize that we are all trying to do this thing together, and that it is NOT good to be alone.

-Liz

Quit being a survivor.

An excerpt from "The Road to Daybreak" by Henri Nouwen:

To celebrate life together, to be together in community, to simply enjoy the beauty of creation, the love of people and the goodness of God - those seem faraway ideals. There seems to be a mountain of obstacles preventing people from being where their hearts want to be. It is so painful to watch and experience. The astonishing things is that the battle for survival has become so "normal" that few people really believe that it can be different. I now understand better why my friends who came to Trosly were so deeply touched. A world they didn't know existed had opened up for them.

Are we in a battle for survival? Are we living life from moment to moment, just hoping to get by and get out alive? Where do you want to be? Deep in your heart, where do you want to be? Why aren't you there?

I make a lot of excuses, so that I don't have to make a change. Usually, the only obstacle to me, is...me. Can we quit just trying to survive and start trying to live?
-Liz

A perfect prayer

From Henri Nouwen's "The Road to Daybreak" :

"O Lord, help me not to be distracted by power and wealth; help me not to be impressed by knowing the stars and heroes of this world. Open my eyes to the suffering of your people, whoever they are, and give me the word that can bring healing and consolation. Amen."

Oh, the things I care about. And look at. And read about. If I gave half of that energy and curiousity to my relationship with Jesus, how much closer would I be to knowing Him, and understanding what true love is?

Wealth and power and fame and fortune and being impressive and relevant and awesome and attractive and funny and funnier and the funniest and an expert and well-read and successful and on and on and on...

Are you as exhausted as I am?
-Liz

"O Lord, help me not to be distracted by power and wealth; help me not to be impressed by knowing the stars and heroes of this world. Open my eyes to the suffering of your people, whoever they are, and give me the word that can bring healing and consolation. Amen."

"I want to have pride like my mother had...

...but not like the kind in the Bible that turns you bad." -The Avett Brothers

There is this saying that, the things that annoy you MOST in people - these things annoy you the most because you see those characteristics in you and you HATE that in yourself.

Of course, that doesn't apply to me. I'm perfect. Well, not perfect, but I'm usually right. And I usually know the right thing to do. I am a great judge of character and am personable and funny and I don't care if people don't like me. It must be them. Not me.

I truly believed that. I catch myself truly believing that now. In small moments, I realize how prideful I am and I am honestly humbled by the bigness of God and the smallness of me. But in every other moment...I am self-righteous and proud and cocky (and I know it's cocky and not confident) and unteachable.

People ask me what I think about things, a lot. And I am critical. A lot. And unimpressed and smug and jaded. When did that happen? When did I become that snobby, distant, self-righteous, judgmental Christian that pretends to have it all together? Because that person...that person annoys me. Those characteristics wrapped up in the same package annoys me. A lot. And here it is, in the mirror, looking back at me. When did that happen?

I think it happened when I stopped letting people know me. And it probably happened when I thought I needed to show people I have it all together so that I would be loved. And it might have happened when I put limits on God and asked Him to get on board with my plan, rather than get on board with His plan. Oh yeah, and it happened when I stopped giving my everyday moments to God.

Tomorrow I will wake up, and I will fight the urge to be a Christian snob. But I won't give up fighting. All day. And I'll make some serious mistakes, but I will give those mistakes to God and pray that He would continue to change my heart. That He would make me soft, and not cold and hardened to the world.


"But when his heart became arrogant and hardened with pride, he was deposed from his royal throne and stripped of his glory." -Daniel 5:20


Be soft, people. I dare you.


-Liz